MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (2/18/10)
Change my password? Now, that’s really scary.
Is it easy? No, it’s kinda hairy!
And you can’t use a word –
That’s unless you use JIM’s dictionary.
TIME-MACHINE TUESDAY LIMERICK (2/19/10)
This one principal liked to harass
PC techs, and I can’t take a pass.
While I’m showing her how,
She was lost in a vow.
Even principals daydream in class.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (2/22/10)
Since his laptop on magnets was stuck,
There’s an engineer down on his luck.
When that laptop had crashed
All this testing was trashed.
I am sure that he cried out, “Oh, darn it all!!!”
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (2/23/10)
“It’s amazing!” I told my friend Jeff.
“Sometimes users can be oh, so deaf.
I said, ‘See how it works?’
She replied, ‘No, you jerk!’
'Just be glad I’m not F L U F!'”
MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (2/26/10)
When we rolled out the brand new machines,
It disrupted a user’s routines.
Though it was kinda draining,
I gave her some training.
She’s now back to counting the beans.
There's a user who wants a drive mapped.
He can't use it? Oh, boy, how he snapped.
What would cause him to smolder?
A doubly named folder
Would cause the guy's pants to get crapped.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (3/1/10)
The mood ‘round the office got steamy
When a boss replied acting so seamy.
He should go take a powder!
We’re not Winfred-Lauder
And talking ‘bout Wick’s aide named Mimi!
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (3/4/10)
There’s no disk space? Now that’s really serious
For the cause is some archives mysterious.
They’re too big. That’s no lie.
He’d be better off by
Toasting all of his spam that’s Nigerious.
MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (3/11/10)
In the ancient times known as the 80’s,
A new change put the mainframe through Hades.
“So you know what to do
With no help from Big Blue,
Here’s instructions. Make sure you obey dese.”
Some time later, I felt I should go.
My instructions were set all aglow.
Since my docs all were banished,
My changes? They vanished.
Now hear me laugh, “I told you so!”
Boastful claims the new boss liked to make.
We all thought that his claims were a fake.
He confirmed all our fears -
It would take him two years
To discover what made his mouse shake.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (3/12/10)
I met Barney, the kindest of souls.
Doing hard things is one of his goals.
He’s what management needs
Doing one of their deeds:
Shoving square pegs inside of round holes.
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (3/15/10)
I once worked giving corporate helps,
When I heard of the higher-up’s yelps
That his PC sure sucked.
“No, it won’t self-destruct
In five seconds. Good luck, Mr. Phelps.”
MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (3/16/10)
There’s some tales. We like to recite ‘em
About users. Yes, they’re quite an item.
This one’s taking a risk
By removing a disk
Using pliers with teeth that will bite ‘em.
Though they sometimes have incorrect grammar,
They all leave us at times with a stammer.
“That must be quite a task.
Yet I still have to ask:
How’d he get the thing in? With a hammer?”
TODAY'S LIMERICK (3/30/10)
Having fun was our ultimate goal
When we went to the alley to bowl.
But a name entry foul
Made the boss start to growl
Before anyone took their first roll.
“I can fix it, since I’m on the ball!”
Said our manager, making the call.
All his poking and typing
Left keglers all griping.
Their systems all crashed, I recall.
From the staff, we received a stern stare
Since their bowlers had much time to spare.
There were some that were pleased
When the tension was eased
By the drinks from the bar that was there.
We were told we should go take a hike
Since this down-time, they really don’t like.
Our next outing? I’ll say
I will be far away
The next time that our manager strikes.
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (3/31/10)
There’s reporting and we need to track it.
But our CIO simply won’t back it.
“There’s some risk? I say no!”
I’m sure this CIO
Surfs the web while he wears a life jacket.
This report's run, and no one's annoyed.
For its timeliness, all have enjoyed.
Like a clock's hourly chime,
It arrives every time
Just as long as this guy was employed.