MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (1/26/2010)
When the bracelet’s magnetic attraction
Caused an unwanted laptop reaction,
“Lose the jewelry,” we said,
“That’s what makes it go dead.”
Now it's working to our satisfaction.
Why have all of our print jobs been blocked?
"All the cabling's messed up!" I squawked.
If the network inspired
How electrical's wired,
I am sure lots of us would be shocked.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (1/29/10)
The new network I put in so well.
“Here’s your user list. Check every cell.”
“Use a spreadsheet? Not when
We’ve got whiteout and pen!”
Here’s a firm that’s refused to Excel.
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (2/2/10)
“It’s now working!” I told my boss, beamin’.
But a neighbor said, “You must be dreamin’!”
He believed I had tripped
‘Til he saw that my script
That pulled demons from daemons was screamin’.
MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (2/3/10)
“It’s deleted!” the user remarked.
So recovering it, I embarked.
“I will try to appease ya.”
Since he’s got amnesia
For names like a Griswold named Clark.
Helping users - my efforts are tireless.
I helped one who had made an entire mess.
There's a cable required
Since his printer is wired
Though he's treating is like it is wireless.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (2/4/10)
In supporting my users, I’m tireless.
For peripherals, most will require less
Than a USB hub.
But, my friend, here’s the rub.
As of yet, they don’t make one that’s wireless.
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (2/5/10)
I keep getting an engineer’s mail
All because of one simple detail.
We both share a last name.
So on what is the blame?
In a sort, my first name will prevail.
So one day, I received a nice note
Thanking all for removing the bloat
From a process so major.
But I sure would wager
It’s thanks to me were quite remote.
I replied to them all but the sender
Telling them of my work with great splendor.
“I worked many a night
So the process was right!”
But in fact I was just a pretender.
When the manager saw this, he said
“Yes, this guy should be earning more bread!”
I then said to my super
That I was a duper.
I thought that I soon would be dead.
Yes, I thought that’s the end of my days
At the firm for receiving false praise.
He replied “You daft bloke!
We all know it’s a joke!”
“I’m not fired? Can I still get that raise?”
MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (2/8/10)
My whole business is earning its keep
From construction guys leaving a heap.
As they cleaned up their trash
They could cause quite a crash
In the space of a single fell sweep.
Fix this glitch - it's my ultimate goal.
Did her text wind up in a black hole?
Things would be much more nifty
If she became shifty
And let things get out of control.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (2/19/20)
In the office of corp’rate elite
I attempted repairs so discreet.
As I worked with aplomb,
She then shrieked to her mom,
“Holy Cow! I’ve got talented feet!”
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (2/10/10)
On this job, we all worked with great stealth.
“Yeah, we’re bringing your PC to health!”
It took three of our staff
To reverse out the gaffe
The pres made, listing everyone’s wealth.
MEMORY-LANE MONDAY LIMERICK (2/11/10)
“The app’s broke! We're in such disarray!”
“Make it trusted!” “It won’t work that way!”
There’s a meeting to see
What to do for "Plan B,"
But the fix wound up being "Plan A."
There's some users we think are the worst.
There are others whose name has been cursed.
If when doing your job
You said, "Thingamabob"
She'd have closed up the floppy door first.
WAYBACK WEDNESDAY LIMERICK (2/12/10)
There’s no email? That’s the sub’s plight
When the DNS record’s not right.
Now their web site's off line.
Hey! Could this be a sign?
Was this Tank ‘bout Computerworld’s site?
Must be CW's site was hosed that day too...
FLASHBACK FRIDAY LIMERICK (2/16/10)
He believes that the job’s incomplete?
Hey! My clients, I never would cheat!
He’s snowed in? What the heck!
I should hire a tech.
What’s the number for Picabo Street?