"Now the server room system's complete.
Motion sensors! It works really neat!"
A blank paper displayed
Flaws in logic were made.
It would cause them to mutter, "Aw, sheet!"
Here's a resume. Whose would it be?
There's no way that this guy we would see.
What the resume said
Went way over his head,
For the guy who had done that was me!
We need drives - it's a fact we'd deduce.
Too expensive - their standard excuse.
A new server they bought,
Then new drives would be bought.
They're replaced, but no longer in use.
Hit the web with my laptop? Hope's slim!
Our security - my view is dim.
In a hotel alone?
I must surf on my phone.
With one finger, I type just like JIM.
I had sent a note - here's what's ahead
Your display will sleep. It won't be dead.
Session stopped? 'Twasn't me!
But it's still nice to see
That the memos I send do get read.
What the guy did just would not compute.
He can't log in each time he'd reboot.
I arrived on the scene.
"Don't be touching your screen.
Use the keys to three-finger salute."
That consultant, a trend he would buck.
If you’re good, at one job you’ll be stuck.
If you’re only okay,
They might send you away.
You’ll go places the more that you suck.
All our logging - I have to applaud it.
For one order, our logs I would audit.
When's the order defaced?
Two days after it's placed.
'Twas the salesman. We're glad that I caught it.
Make a call on my phone? What's the deal?!?
Snap a pic of that number? Get real!
"My banana-shaped phone -
It won't work!" I would moan.
Though it's broken, it's still got appeal!
Today I celebrate ten years of writing limericks
for Shark Tank stories!!!
Asked the CIO MBA grad,
"Now, is latency good? Is it bad?"
We bamboozled the bloke
With a manager's joke.
Since the incident's closed, we're all glad.
There's some pay that is coming to me.
When I checked it out, what did I see?
'Twas a really cruel trick.
Bet the guy's name is Dick,
Only spelled with a lower case "d".
When that hurricane Ike stormed on through,
"Take your laptops home. That's what to do."
The disaster rec guy
Didn't follow that. Why?
He might just want a laptop that's new.
Though the rules I never betray,
I'm suspended from work for one day.
Now the system group's norm
Is to fill out a form.
In that way, we can all C our A.