Since our programs would never run right.
We pushed IE with all of our might.
So is Firefox okay?
When I checked, I said "Nay"
Since Mozilla would block its own site.
There's a guy - my assistance he sought.
He'd forget his darned password - a lot.
When we made it his name
The result was the same.
What it really should be: "IForgot."
Every warehouse, they're eager to view.
But IT? That's the group they'll eschew.
To our group, they said "Beat it!
Your help, we don't need it!"
Except for the times when they do.
Past that S&L bank I once cruised.
In a flash I'm enlightened, amused.
When the call came our way
That they're down, I would say
For the fix, I would have to refuse.
A new terminal we will be gaining.
Our old door systems won't need maintaining.
There'll be spare parts a plenty
From trashing VIC-20's
Old doors, they will need some retraining.
With those cards, this one class was encumbered
Through the hall, there's a student who lumbered.
Cards were dropped! What the heck?!?
I thought, "Unlike his deck,
Were his days in that Cobol class numbered?"
Using Firefox or Chrome? It's a pain.
IE's standard! Please let me explain:
It's to keep our staff pure.
We just making darned sure
We're all on board the Microsoft train.
Legal docs? Users made them all sexy,
Except one - her PC acted "hexy."
Her WordPerfect got nixed
All because she deep-sixed
The file WPDOS.EXE
What was quarantined made some guys drool.
They'd try viewing them. They ran like stool.
Windows users are cynics -
I'm glad I use Linux:
There's times being admin is cool.
Was his laptop put under a hex?
'Twas from content related to sex.
When kids grade him, they may
Give this prof a big 'A',
But I'd have to give "triple-X."
There's an issue - we hope to defuse it.
Big storm outage? We have to reduce it.
What the bosses all say:
Network's back in one day.
There's just nobody out there to use it.
Ahoy, matey, that bloke's unaware.
'E's got IM already, me swear!
When the scurvy dog asked
If I finished his task,
So I proved it was already there.
Happy Talk Like a Pirate Day!!!
When debugging their programs, it seemed
That the students got more than they'd dreamed.
Costs and paper? No fun!
There were more ways than one
That the students would always get reamed.
There were checks to be printed that day.
The "CHECKS" printer was down, so you say?
A new printer we'd choose.
The "A" printer we'd use.
Did the checks print out fine? "FNA!!!"
Though I work with two college grad masters,
I'm the one who could program much faster.
All their theory's okay,
But it won't help today
Since the section one's on's a disaster.
It's called "Mongo." You know what that means.
They'll recall a film's favorite scenes.
I have got a good hunch
When they're ordering lunch
They should not place an order for beans.
Overhearing a tech support chat
Where the tech got so mad that she spat.
It's the password he used.
Tell this woman? Refused.
What's his password? "ThatMakesYouLookFat"
In a pickle? We couldn't be deeper.
IT's canned - it was like the grim reaper.
Though the FIN's named the same,
Now I'd give it this name:
The "Field Unicode Certified Keeper."
As the VP tuned in, he thought, "Shush!
We must have a new server name push."
So the IT group aims
To use presidents' names.
That way, Clinton could go down on Bush.
"I can't get in my laptop!" she'd groan.
What's her password? The answer's unknown.
"You don't know it? You should!"
Find a keyboard, she's good
Since her hands have a mind of their own.