April 13 - 17, 2009

April 17, 2009 - Not quite the result they were planning

I had money that I had to spend,
So I thought I could follow a trend
For my vision correction.
I made the selection
Of lasik, my contacts to end.

Though I wished that the healing would hurry,
All my co-workers tended to worry.
They had changed out my screen
But their joke wasn’t seen
Because everything to me was blurry.


April 16, 2009 - We don't mind the other stuff, but the mouse-slamming makes this one urgent

I’ll say fixing that laptop was scary
Since the ticket I got made me wary.
That’s the stuff that we see
Since the MCSE
We call F L U F got a new dictionary.


April 15, 2009 - Because nontechnical is what he's all about

The exec thought that he should acknowledge
When I used all my technical knowledge.
Though it turned out all right,
It’s like he could be writing
Acceptance emails for some college.
 

The reasoning for this one is that around the beginning of this month, a few colleges made the mistake of blasting out acceptance email messages to prospective students they had not accepted. They had to send out hurriedly written emails soon afterward explaining themselves.


In honor of Tax Day in the US:

In the spring, it is everyone’s onus
To pay taxes with minimum slowness.
Though we maybe use Quicken,
It just serves to sicken
Us, funding an AIG bonus.

 

Yes, I know I also used this for the "Joke's On You" a couple months ago. I figured enough ST readers did not hit this web site, so it would still be new to them.


April 14, 2009 - It's easier that way

It’s a pain when a hospital’s shrink
Thinks the PC he’s got’s on the blink.
He will act like the geek
Just converses in Greek
Which can drive many sane men to drink.


April 13, 2009 - Optional extras

They had made the right laptop repair,
But they gave to the boss quite a scare.
When they cleaned up the Joe,
They said they didn’t know
What to do with the parts that were spare.

Though they played a joke on him, you see,
JIM would fire them, don’t you agree?
One would have to be nuts
To be labeled a putz,
Like me spelling “pursuit” with an “E”.

This limerick has been parsed for spelling and grammar by a beta version of "SPIELCHUCK" by JTBSoft. This is a new, totally radical plug-in to most major word processors including Microsoft Word, Word Perfect and WordStar. A couple of the newest features is a dictionary of common Latin phrases and an "ignore rules" feature identified to the system by entering the text in all upper case. Available at all finer computer re... well, not all the finer, but most... well, it is still in beta... well, just Google the name, making sure you have the InPrivate feature on IE8 running if you are doing this at work.